written by Erica Quam
There are people who we come across in our lives who can trigger a whole downward spiral of negative emotions in us. It's the person who walks in the room and we can feel ourselves begin to react - we get tense, and our guard goes up. It feels like the life and energy inside of us is literally getting sucked away. I'll bet you're picturing them in your head right now!
So, what's up with that?
Do they honestly have that much power over us? Is it really possible for one single person to ruin our day?
I used to refer to these types of people as energy vampires. But that just made me the victim...and I don't want to be a victim. I want to be strong, powerful, & in control. So, for me, I had to change how I looked at these types of people in my life.
And how on earth do we change that?
The first step is to acknowledge your triggers. Begin to look at your reactions. Be an observer. When you react to someone in a way that is way out of proportion to what they actually did or said - it's time to stop and put on the brakes. Instead of letting this person control you, stop and thank them.
Really? Thank them?
Oh great...more gratitude? Is that the answer to everything?
When I began to look at people who triggered me as a type of person instead of taking things personally, it changed everything for me. Instead of getting hooked, I was able to take a step back in an attempt to learn something from them.
I also realized that if I didn't learn how to deal with that type of person in my life, I would continue to be presented with more people like them...until I learned that lesson.
The universe does, after all, have a sense of humor!
The better I got at observing these triggers, the more I realized it usually had much more to do with something I allowed - instead of something they may have said or done. I had said yes, when I really meant no - or I hadn't said anything at all. I hadn't set a boundary or limit with this person that clearly needed to be set.
So, instead of energy vampires, I now like to think of these people as gifts from the universe. Another important life lesson.
And when we receive a gift from someone...say thank you.
Who gets you hooked? What can you learn? Share your comments and ah ha's below.